May 09, 2020
Growing up, I undeniably enjoyed reading. As a kid, I recalled strolling through the shelves of the bookstores looking for interesting reads and engrossing myself between the pages of Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys and Harry Potter. I received The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones in 2011 as a Christmas gift from my cousin and that was when I became captivated with books. I felt a connection with reading that I couldn’t deny and my book collection started from thereon. I’ve always been plagued with anxiety and depression and most times, the news adds to that where I’ve reached the point of thinking about ending my life. I know I would never do that to myself nor others but the feeling makes me angry because I never understood the reasons behind all the wars and inequalities that are rampant in the world. Most times, it’s overwhelming and I’ve found solace between the pages of books, among characters old and new and the love that I’ve always selfishly desired from the real world. They’ve become a part of me and are my guardian angels in their own way. Additionally, I’ve found solace in books because they help me in the realm of romance and the life I wish to live. I’ve always been a romantic and I think books and movies influenced that at a very young age. I am currently 26 years old and I’m not ashamed that I’ve always been single but I do feel a sense of sadness with the realization that everyone gets chosen and I haven’t even though I’ve put myself out there countless times. Some days I’m okay with it but other days, the feeling is overwhelming. Meeting new characters in different places with their struggles, even those that are similar, help me a whole lot and that’s a big thing for me. Unsurprisingly, I’ve also found solace in writing. I’ve always been one who lived in fantasy worlds which then lead to me writing them. I’ve always been a writer and I hope to be a published one someday. Writing helps me to build my own fantasy, to create my own characters and friends, to be able to help people out there and to let them feel the same way that I always do when I open a book. In all my times of darkness, books have been my light. When I find it difficult to be myself, believe in myself or even when the weight of the world is on my shoulders, books and the characters within them, greet me like a long lost friend, their hands outstretched ready to hold me and comfort me. I can never have a good life without books because books are angels in disguise.