I’m a pastor's daughter, when you think of that usually people think of a happy life with the white picket fence and full of happiness. Well that wasn’t how my life truly was, my parent’s started fighting a lot and my big sister who was also my best friend my dad was controlling a lot more. The police would show up at our house in the middle of the night and one night they took my dad away, in the mornings after big fights he would come to us kids crying saying that he is affected by alcohol differently than normal people, I was a daddy’s girl so I would forgive him immediately but there was always questions lingering in my head. But then one day it finally happened, my mom kicked him out and I helped him pack his things in a trash bag and gave him my favorite bear named ted.

After that my oldest sister and mom would sit down with me every night and explain that what I thought was a normal life that every kid had, but my life was far from. My life was actually full of mental, physical, and sexual abuse. Statistically those who have been abused usually are on the abusers side and I wanted to fight against that because I didn’t want to be the statistics and I did avoid them but my sister didn't make it. She got into a lot of bad stuff, drinking, drugs, and cheating on her fiance. I stopped seeing him and at the same time I had to stop seeing my sister, it hurt so much to lose my dad and my best friend, plus my brother also took my dad’s side.

I closed down and barely talked to anyone, at school I would put on a smile and act like everything was okay. I had a constant struggle in my head but I hid it from my mom and other two sisters which just caused my mind to be even more exhausted. Okay now to the books stuff.

I'm dyslexic and reading has always been a huge struggle for me. I hated reading because everytime I picked up a book I felt like I was stupid because it took SO long to read it. Then my mom started dating a guy and we got to talking and he told me about audiobooks. He shared his audible account with me and bought me all the Divergent books. Books opened up a whole new world that I could escape and I wouldn’t be trapped in my mind. I felt all the emotions of the characters and I didn’t have to put on a smile. I absolutely love books now and Mortal Instruments is absolutely amazing and have got me through so much. I’m so much better now and yes I’m an introvert but I’m getting through life one day at a time.